Grateful for new friends and fathers
Who are some people you have never thought of as potential friends? maybe you are one of those people, like my father was, who makes on-going friends instantaneously with everyone they meet. I have always been shy about making friends, especially with people i do business with. Not people who are my customers, but the people who i pay, the people who call me their customer. I don’t know why. I am thankful, because just today i realized that i have come to love two people as dear friends, and i am also their customer. For one, it has taken us nearly nine years to get to this point. I realized she and i had made that breakthrough when last week, while at her place of business, she confided her worries about a big show she is doing in Chicago this weekend… we got into a deep discussion, which ended in hugs. I thought about her insecurities last night, knowing she was leaving today. I popped off a quick email reminding her that she is rock solid on the topic, just to be her wonderful self. About 3 in the morning, i received a simple text: Love You.
My other friend-from-commerce and i bonded right away. I don’t see this person that often, but when i do, like today, we can spend forever talking about so many things… restricted only by time limits placed on us by other business appointments. It’s so wonderful to have friends that you can hug and tell them you love them, and they you. What support!
I think many can agree that we, as artists, are often a tad off the main-stream in some regards. For one thing, unlike many people who go to work, do something, and then leave it behind for the day, being an artist is not just a job, it’s a way of thinking and living. You do not leave that behind when you close up shop at night. At least for me, i am constantly seeing things, reading things, listening to things, talking to people that move me, are inspiring, set my mind on imagining how that inspiration would translate into a painting or drawing. Then there’s artists’ block, procrastination in the face of deadlines, insecurities about the quality or acceptability of work, and on and on. I’m putting a link below that talks about these things, and addresses how important it is for artists to be part of a strong community to keep mentally well. I am thankful for the supporting and kind people i know through the artists’ community in the treasure valley. For years i stayed away from that, until i finally reached out a few years ago, first to some artists i met at an annual Boise Open Studios weekend, and then to Candy Canning at the Catalyst Artists Collaborative. What a difference those open arms have made in my life.
The art work i’m sharing in this journal entry, “Daddy’s Axe,” i made decades ago. I was 11 years old. It was for my father - in many ways, the love of my life. He was a person who accepted everyone just the way they were, including me. He was an artist himself, a professional musician in Los Angeles. If you look closely in the lower right hand corner, i worked my signature into the painting -Vescovo- my maiden name. I didn’t know this painting still existed. I found it, saw it again for the first time in years and years, at the bottom of a chest, tucked in a manilla envelope, the colors still vibrant, just like the memories of my father.
With thanks,
—frankie
Interesting Reading, Good for Mind and Body
Link to artists’ need for community:
https://sketchdesignrepeat.com/artist-mental-health-and-the-importance-of-community/Here’s an intreguiging essay about artists’ friendships:
https://comment.org/the-art-of-friendship/
And a fun one about friendship between artist and non-artist: (warning: lots of pop-ups)
https://www.theodysseyonline.com/5-realities-being-friends-artist
From the American Psychological Assn of why friendships promote good health:
https://www.apa.org/monitor/2023/06/cover-story-science-friendship
This link to an article about the role of friendship, generally speaking, in physical and mental health:
https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/friendships/art-20044860
Finally, here’s a little mention of my father made in 2022, 11 years after his death…. just a tiny thing that my dad was part of early in his career, that shows the foundation of the person he was:
https://downbeat.com/news/detail/jazz-group-of-the-year-charles-lloyd-the-marvels
